P90 Bootcamp = Regaining Life

Year 2, Month 4:

So for the past 49 days or so, I have been working out, six days a week, alternating strengthening workouts with cardiac workouts.

I have Tony Horton and the Power90 video series to thank for it.  But first, before you get any ideas that I am one of those "success stories" floating around on the internet with a rock solid body, let me tell you that I AM NOT!

I am not an athletic person by nature.  I am a couch potato, perfectly content to sit on the bed or the couch with my laptop where it belongs -- on my lap.  That is most of my life.

But, being that my life has taken some very bizarre twists and turns over the past three years, I decided that I needed to make getting healthy my priority again.

So here I am, halfway through the P90 Bootcamp workout series:

Yep, that's me!  Proof that someone my age can still get a good workout!  Of course, it doesn't take much to be a workout for me.  All I have to do at my age, is go outside and deadhead the roses for an hour or so and I'm pooped.  After all, I'm the one who gets ready for bed at 8:30, and am happy as a clam to just lay in bed and read a book until I am so sleepy I can't focus anymore.

Lately, however, my night-time book reading has centered around text books:  Nursing books, Anatomy & Physiology, etc.  Not the best entertainment, but a necessity.  I am, after all, a college student once again.

Once you see this video, you will notice that there is still quite a bit of -- shall-we-say, "jiggling" going on.  I wasn't doing the P90 workouts to lose weight.  I was doing them to get in shape.

Suffice it to say, I have decided it is time to start watching what I eat again, also.  Time to cut out the junk and focus on something better -- more whole foods, fruits and vegetables.

Step by step, I am regaining my life. 

Now if I could only find answers to the constant heart palpitations.  Stay tuned for more research!!

PAP Tests, Low Blood Counts, Autoimmune Disease

Year 2, Month 1:

Just over two years ago it was determined through a routine PAP test that my cells were a little abnormal, but nothing to worry about. The abnormal cells were what is known as ASCUS cells: Atypical Squamous Cells of Uncertain Significance. In other words:

“cells that cover most of the external part of the cervix (squamous cells-ASCUS) or in the cells that cover the lining of the uterus opening and canal (glandular cells-AGCUS) for which the cause is undetermined.” (Lab Tests Online)

They told me to come back in a year for another exam.  I didn’t worry about it. In fact, I forgot about it.

A year later, I was in a new town with a new medical clinic. I was retested for the PAP as previouly suggested, and when it came up abnormal (again), I was immediately retested. This time, not only were my cells abnormal, but they were changing. They had upgraded themselves from ASCUS to LGSIL (Low-Grade Squamous Intraepithelial Lesions, "lesions" meaning "abnormal cells") – not necessarily cancerous, but scary nonetheless.


Time to Backtrack.....


What is a PAP test anyway? It is an examination of the cells collected from the cervix to detect cancer or abnormal cells that could possibly lead to cancer. This type of cancer (cervical) is usually slow-growing and may not have any symptoms at all.  The PAP test can also identify noncancerous conditions, such as infections and inflammation (National Cancer Institute, 2010).

What do my results mean? There are many types of cells and results. Without getting too technical, let me just briefly explain the most common cell types and results. For more detailed information, please visit the National Cancer Institute website or Google other reputable sources.

For most people, the results will either be “normal” or “abnormal” such as mine was two years ago. I was told not to worry because “abnormal” does not necessarily mean cancerous, and in fact, “abnormal” rarely becomes cancerous (National Cancer Institute).

Abnormal (Squamous) Cell Types:

ASC, ASC-US:  Initially, my “abnormal” cells were ASC (atypical squamous cells), and more specifically, ASC-US (atypical squamous cells of undetermined significance, as mentioned above).  These types of abnormal cells are fairly common, and can be related to HPV infection (Human Papilloma Virus).

LSIL, LGSIL: Climbing up the worry ladder, the next step is LSIL (LGSIL): Low-Grade Squamous Intraepithelial Lesions. This is what appeared in my test results the following year and indicated changes in the size and shape of the cells. It usually means “mild abnormalities caused by HPV infection” (National Cancer Institute) which carries the potential to become cancer.

HSIL, HGSIL: Next up is HSIL (HGSIL): High-Grade Squamous Intraepithelial Lesions. At this stage, there are more obvious changes in the size and shape of the (precancerous) cells and they don’t even resemble normal cells anymore.

SQUAMOUS CELL CARCINOMA: Following HSIL cells is simply Squamous Cell Carcinoma: it becomes cancer.


Back to the Story...

In 2011, I was referred to a specialist who performed a colposcopy and biopsy. At the same time, blood tests were run by my regular medical provider, and it was found that my blood count was low. My red blood cells were low, and my white blood cells were even lower. Ruling everything else out, I was given three likely causes: Cancer, HIV, or Lupus (or some other autoimmune response).

"Autoimmune response?"  Haven't I been barking up this tree for long enough yet?  I have had numerous symptoms pointing to an autoimmune problem for over two years now, and we still can't figure this out?

What was going on with my body? First it was thought to be Celiac Disease, and then a gluten intolerance. What was happening to me? My system was so down that now my blood count was low and my last four PAP tests were all abnormal, each one progressively worse.

The only good news seemed to be that results of the colposcopy and biopsy indicated that the cells "appeared" to be on the mend. They were trying to get better. I was told to report back in six months for another PAP test….

This time I took it seriously.

But what about the low blood count? More blood tests were done, HIV ruled out, and lupus not likely. I was sent to a hematologist at the local cancer clinic. Talk about scary. A cancer clinic? Really? If it wasn't HIV or lupus, was it cancer?

More blood tests were done by the hematologist, and suddenly, I was in the clear. Somehow, my blood cells also appeared to be on the mend. They were finally increasing. I was told to take iron pills to keep the red blood cells at optimal levels.

Fast forward to 2012… I got a phone call from the clinic after my most recent PAP and was told to come in for blood tests again.  I knew they were checking for infection of some kind, and since I had not yet heard the results of my PAP, I figured it probably was not good news. Sure enough, it was “abnormal” again.  It was my fifth "abnormal" PAP in a row.

…and... the CBC revealed low blood counts.  Back to square one.


PAP Tests and Autoimmune Disorders.....

So what does all this have to do with Celiac Disease or gluten intolerance?

Is there a connection between abnormal PAP results and Celiac? Well, actually… Yes, not just Celiac, but autoimmune disorders in general. That means your immune system sometimes attacks the wrong cells in the body, causing inflammation and other problems.

In fact, just last year, the National Institute of Health posted a study about the “Association of Pap smear abnormalities with autoimmune disorders” (Pak j Biol Sci 2011 May).

This study suggested that “there might be an association between immunological disorders and cervical premalignant and malignant abnormalities” (Esmaeili H, Ghahremanzadeh K.; NIH). Though most of their focus was on lupus (SLE) and rheumatoid arthritis (RA), they found that “Frequency of abnormal Pap smear testing was significantly higher” (boldface added) among those women affected with an autoimmune disorder, yet not statistically different between the autoimmune disorders. (Full Text here)

Lupus is probably one of the most well known and studied autoimmune diseases, although Celiac Disease occurs in 1 in every 133 people.  According to Johns Hopkins Hospital, “studies have shown an elevated risk of cervical cancer and abnormal PAP tests in women with lupus”  and I can see the logic.  When your immune system is compromised, it makes it harder for us to fight off viruses including HPV, which can lead to cervical cancer.

It seems obvious that something is happening between autoimmune disorders and cervical cancer and/or abnormal PAP results.


Blood Counts.....

And what about the low blood counts? Is there a connection with Celiac or gluten intolerance?

It just so happens that just the other day, I ran across an article "The Connection Between Gluten Intolerance and Low Platelets" which states that:

when "gluten is ingested, the immune system goes to work fighting off what it believes to be a harmful invader. In those with an undiagnosed intolerance to this protein, the immune system is continually in 'fight' mode, which begins to cause a host of autoimmune problems." (I Told You I Was Sick) 

This article also goes on to say:

"Though many conventional doctors do not agree with the gluten/low platelet connection, studies show that those with celiac disease or gluten intolerance are more likely to have decreased platelet counts."

Though we know very little about the author and she does not cite her sources, she uses Leaky Gut Syndrome as a compelling example, in that "the lining of the gut is more porous than it’s supposed to be, allowing undigested particles of food to leak into the blood stream, causing body-wide inflammation and allergic response" (I Told You I Was Sick).

This is definitely something I will be looking into further, and will post my findings here. 

In the meantime, I don't know what 2012 will bring me as far as my health goes.  I have high hopes that it will continue to be another year of recovery.  The year marks my 2nd year of research and new discoveries... of taking my health into my own hands, and finding a path that will give me answers.

For the most part, I remain gluten-free because the medical community has not been able to provide any solid answers for me -- as to why I became so sick in the first place; why my heart began to fail; why my body has been wracked with one immune problem after the other... it has been a slow process, but a learning process.

One step at a time...

New Beginnings

Well, here I am.

It has been nearly 18 months since my last entry, and I am staring at a blank page before me, wondering what to write.  I seriously doubt there is anybody out there reading this, but just in case -- please accept my apologies for staying away so long.

How do I explain my absence and what has been going on in my life without getting too personal?  I don't know that I can, so I will just spill it here.... right now.  Get it over with, and move on.

To make a long story short, my marriage ended, I moved myself with five of my kids back to my home state of Washington to start a new life, and go back to school.... again.

As for my health, no one ever did find irrerutable proof of celiac disease, and so I have had to settle with a gluten intolerance.  In fact, there was never any explanation given for any of the strange symptoms that have beguiled me over the last several years.

However, I can say this much:  I feel healthier now than I have over the past few years since all of this began.  I still get the unexplained heart palpitations and every time I mention hormones to anyone in the medical profession, I get the "rolled eye" expression without the rolled eyes.  I have been told so many times by menopausal women that they experienced the same thing, and yet the medical community still continues to scoff at it.  Why?

Since moving away and starting anew, I have slacked on my committment to exercise, and that is something I need to pick up again -- it is something I need to do for myself.  It is something I very much want to pick up again and find the time much as I did before.  It was the first time in my life I had ever stayed with an exercise routine for any length of time -- 10 months, 6 days a week.  I did it because it was a priority for me, and it needs to become a priority again.

I am off of all prescription medications, and still eating gluten-free.  There have been a few slip-ups with gluten, but I will usually pay the price for it, hence the self-diagnosed gluten intolerance.  Gluten is tough on the body, and after having been away from it for so long, reintroducing it can cause problems with which I don't care to deal.  I've been down that road and don't want to go there again.

As for this blog, I would like to gradually change the focus from celiac disease to just living a healthier lifestyle -- not just physically, but also mentally.  I may even just start a new blog and leave this one up for those who are searching for answers, just like I was.  I am still searching for answers.  I just haven't found any.

And as if all this change in my life isn't enough, I just discovered today, that I had a number of comments awaiting my approval to be posted and I was never notified by Blogger that they existed!  I feel bad and hope to be on the ball from now on!!!

Stay tuned, don't give up on me, and we will see where this all leads.

Week 25 Recap: An Unremarkable Week

Week 25 was a very busy week, but I made sure I remembered to use the proper bioidentical hormone creams twice daily as I attempted to see if there would be any changes in the trembling I had been experiencing most notably during the night. I started with progesterone cream and would continue with this for a couple weeks and then stop for a week before starting estrogen cream.

Early in the week I noted that my heart doesn’t seem to like it when I lay down in certain positions, such as directly on my left side. It often feels as though it loses its pumping efficiency and I find myself changing positions so that I can breathe easier. I found that if I lay at an angle (not directly on either side, but leaning forward or back), breathing becomes more comfortable.

The trembling I had experienced over the past several weeks had died down somewhat during the first part of the week and so I thought maybe the progesterone cream was working, but the trembling reoccurred in the chest area about midweek, though it was relatively minor.

My exercise routine actually seemed to get easy enough for me to kick it up a notch and walk a bit faster at about 4 mph. This lasted for several days, but by the end of the week it felt like more of a challenge again. During one session on the Pilates Reformer I felt some mild heart fluttering and so took it easy during that session. That was the only time something like that happened during the week. Exercise totals included 90 minutes strength-training and 15.5 miles on the treadmill.

Overall, it was not a remarkable week and contained all the usual stresses of life.  In spite of the days I didn't feel like exercising or was too stressed, I continued to keep it up even if it was at a minimum.  I'm not ready to give up yet.  It ain't over!

Week 24 Recap: Celiac and Menopause?

Week 24 started out much better than the previous week, though I still wasn’t sleeping very well and continued to experience pronounced night-time internal trembling. At one point, the nocturnal trembling/tremors got to me and I did more Googling even though I hadn’t been able to find much about it with previous internet searches. This time was different.

This time I found a website called PowerSurge which is “an informative and supportive menopause community for women going through the transition of perimenopause to postmenopause.” I was very excited about this because I also knew that this was the exact time of life I was going through.  My mind began to make instant connections.

The more I read on this website the more I began to believe that perimenopause might be the cause of just about everything I had gone through for at least the past year! I continued to read about the “34 Signs of Menoapuse” which I will list here even though I do not have all of these symptoms and most women never will have all of them at once:

1. Hot flashes, flushes, night sweats and/or cold flushes
2. Bouts of rapid heartbeat (including palpitations, skipped heartbeats and irregular heartbeats)
3. Irritability
4. Mood swings, sudden tears
5. Trouble sleeping
6. Irregular periods (including phantom periods when you experience the symptoms that come with the onset of a period, but no period arrives. This is apparently common in perimenopause.)
7. Loss of libido
8. Vaginal dryness
9. Crashing fatigue
10. Anxiety, feeling ill at ease
11. Feelings of dread, apprehension, and doom
12. Difficulty concentrating, disorientation, and mental confusion
13. Disturbing memory lapses
14. Incontinence
15. Itchy, crawly skin
16. Aching, sore joints, muscles and tendons
17. Increased tension in muscles
18. Breast tenderness
19. Headache change (increase or decrease
20. Gastrointestinal distress, indigestion, flatulence, gas pain, nausea
21. Sudden bouts of bloat
22. Depression
23. Exacerbation of any existing conditions
24. Increase in allergies
25. Weight gain (particularly around waist and thighs)
26. Hair loss or thinning
27. Dizziness, light-headedness, episodes of loss of balance
28. Changes in body odor
29. Electric shock sensation under the skin and in the head
30. Tingling in the extremities
31. Gum problems, increase bleeding
32. Burning tongue
33. Osteoporosis (after several years)
34. Brittle fingernails, which peel and break easily

Several more symptoms are listed in addition to these and this is what really grabbed my attention:

• Dry skin / skin changes
• Internal shaking / tremor-like feelings
• Acne and other skin eruptions
• Itching wildly and erratic rashes
• Shoulder pain / joints / arthritis development or flare-up
• “Heart pain” – a feeling of pain in the area of the heart
• Acid reflux / heartburn / difficulty digesting certain foods

Though I have experienced many of the original 34 signs, I think most of my recent symptoms are in that last group of symptoms! I immediately referred to an entire section on Internal shaking / tremor-like feelings and was astonished to find page after page after page of thousands of women who were experiencing the exact same thing! In fact, this particular forum was so huge it had been broken down into three or four sub-groups!! Like me, most women were told by their medical providers that is was probably nerves and often offered anti-anxiety drugs.

 HELLO?  What is going on with the medical community these days? During the first three months of the onset of my ‘illness’, I was offered anti-anxiety drugs by at least three different medical providers without even looking further into any physical reason for why I was suddenly (keyword) having these symptoms.

 The Internal shaking/tremor forum comments ran well into the thousands and I could read every day for hours and never be able to keep up with them all as more are being posted every day. But the general consensus seems to be that no one knows why these tremors/tremblings happen. Some have them in place of hot flashes, and some have them at specific times of the month, but most believe it is related somehow to our endocrine system and the fluctuations in estrogen and progesterone.

This caused me to think two things: First, I was okay. If thousands of other women were experiencing this around the globe and were going through the same ‘change of life’ as myself, then it was probably harmless. Second, I remembered back to when these tremors started – almost a year ago when I stopped using estrogen and progesterone creams because I couldn’t afford them. Probably within a couple months, the tremors started in my neck. I remember this distinctly even though it didn’t happen very often -- at first I thought my carotid pulse was racing! But when I put my hand on my chest or when I felt my carotid artery, it was calm. I didn’t think much of it as it happened off and on throughout the end of summer and early fall. By late fall, things came crashing down and my journey here began.

I also made the connection between the strange, oblong vertical bumps on my fingernails and the endocrine system (I found it here). Again—the endocrine system—which in general, regulates our hormones and glands.

I figured it was time to get back on the estrogen and progesterone creams and see if there was any improvement with anything. More about the endocrine system can be found at the National Institute of Health.

I also figured that many of my symptoms were alleviated by going gluten-free.  I wondered if there was a connection between gluten intolerance and hormones or more specifically, peri- and- menopause.

Though Week 24 was a long and difficult one, culminating in a dance recital for my girls and additional schoolwork toward my college degree, I felt my health was once again on the rebound. I was able to clock in over three hours of strength training (105 minutes of Pilates and 100 minutes on the Reformer), and logged 17.3 miles on the treadmill—all with complete normalcy… and that is a good thing.

Week 23 Recap: Pressing the Re-Set Button

About 10 years ago I fell in love with an X-Box game my kids used to play called Need For Speed.  It was a racing game in which as you earned points you could buy better and faster cars and race against other drivers in beautiful locations around the world.  If I ever got stuck or couldn't maneuver, I could push the black re-set button and my car would be re-positioned and ready to go.  I have oftened wished for a re-set button in life.

 As the month of May ended and June began, it marked the seventh month since my journey to regain my health began. The question as to whether or not I actually have celiac disease remains debatable, though my personal inclination is to lean toward a gluten intolerance brought on by something else, possibly a virus. Swine flu was running rampant through the town last year, and in fact I believe one of my own children came down with it as well. Perhaps there was something in all the viruses floating around that attacked my system in a different way.

Week 23 started out with almost no sleep again, with my personal GPS (code for vertigo) still out of whack, frequently causing bouts of nausea and an upset stomach. And if that wasn’t enough, I was walking around with an internal ‘buzz’ for most of the week, like some kind of massive caffeine high (I haven't had any caffeine for 7 months).

With the onset of the vertigo last week I decided I’d had enough with all the drugs and vitamin supplements. I rebelled and quit taking the prescribed ergocalciferol, and all the vitamins with the exception of calcium/magnesium, iron, and 325 mg enteric-coated aspirin (prescribed by the internist when they thought I might have had a TIA).

I went to my internist on Tuesday to discuss the results of the thyroid blood draws the previous week and the vertigo. The blood tests were all within normal range, and though he had no explanation for the vertigo, he performed the canalith repositioning exercises on me (a good description of this procedure can be found here) and in the process taught me how to do it myself until the vertigo went away. He explained that he experienced it himself last summer and took care of it successfully.

I performed the repositioning exercises faithfully at least four times a day, and even though most of the reactions seemed delayed (about 20 seconds after changing positions) and sometimes the reactions hit with a bang, the vertigo gradually improved until it was completely gone within 48 hours after my first repositioning session.

The end of the week brought more pronounced internal (and nocturnal) trembling in the chest area. Sometimes it even seemed to migrate down my arms towards my hands. Was it because I eliminated the extra vitamin supplements from my diet? Was this yet another withdrawal reaction? I don’t know. Only time will tell.

My exercise routine was very successful throughout the week with just over 4 hours of strength training exercises including 150 minutes of Pilates and 100 minutes on the Reformer. Additionally I walked 19 miles on the treadmill at a brisk pace.

It was a good week, but one which was clouded with apprehension with the reminder that anything could go wrong with little warning.

Week 22 Recap: …And Two Steps Back

Week 22 started out with a scare. I was getting ready for the day, doing my Facemaster (which I have used for about 6 years now), when I suddenly started having multiple palpitations (a rather large flip-flop) to the point where my heart began to pound rapidly. It was rather frightening because for about 5-10 seconds my heart just could not get back on track. My pulse jumped to about 110. I didn't know what to make of it. I wasn't stressed, wasn't thinking about anything in particular, just watching TV while doing my face. I was completely relaxed, although after that little incident I have to admit I was pretty frightened.

I couldn’t remember the last time I felt like that. In the past I had experienced a sudden rapid and pounding heart beat, and had experienced the multiple palpitation/flip-flop feeling but couldn't remember when/if I had ever felt the two of them together. It was quite disconcerting because I thought I was over all of that!

After the ‘incident’ my left chest was aching, as well as my left arm. I was thinking it may be an anxiety reaction. I wasn’t under stress, but felt frustrated because I had been doing so much better, and now this – totally out of the blue, for no apparent reason. I couldn’t shake the anxiety and so ended up taking 1 mg lorazepam, which made me groggy for the rest of the day. Though I felt physically fine, I was emotionally let down. It depressed me because I felt like I went through an event that had no reason for happening. If I knew the cause, I could dismiss it and move on. Perhaps last week’s stomach upsets and chest fluttering led to this latest development?

I determined to ignore it the best I could. Just -- it is what it is-- it happened, I don't know what it is, get on with life.

After about two weeks of quitting Prilosec my stomach finally began to settle down, though I continued to experience the internal trembling that no doctors have been able to address so far. When it happens during the day it is like a major caffeine buzz, but at night it seems more pronounced and can be felt through the skin. I began to wonder if all this internal trembling is related to something with my nervous system that may also occasionally interfere with the electrical conduction of my heart.

I had a checkup with the internist this week and talked to him about the sudden flip-flop I had experienced out of the blue. He said if I had a mitral valve prolapse (MVP) it would have been spotted on the echocardiogram we did back in January, and that he didn’t think I had dysautonomia, but he wanted to recheck all of my thyroid levels—particularly because he noticed that my weight had gone up and then back down quite rapidly (in a few months time). He also mentioned that he was going to be talking with someone else about my case to help get some answers, which is always nice to know.

I asked him when I might see an improvement in the osteopenia and he said it could take up to 2 years to see a difference in bone density. It was a good visit – my blood pressure was 102/74 and my pulse was 84 – a little elevated for me but probably because I was nervous. I had about 5 tubes of blood drawn for the thyroid and iron blood tests.

The internal trembling continued throughout the week and at night it even felt like my eyelids were trembling. Another strange and new symptom began appearing this week: dizziness especially upon awakening and upon sitting up. In the meantime, I continued to take the clobetasol proprionate ointment as prescribed for the rashes on my arms.

By mid-week it was clear that this was

going to continue to be a very strange week!

I began to have stress days. For some weird reason I just couldn’t seem to control my levels of stress. My brain was telling me something was wrong or going go happen even though there was no physical indication or rationale for such an event. I felt like the Star Trek character Data when his emotion chip is implanted and it goes awry. Once it is deactivated he normalizes. It felt as though my stress ‘chip’ had gone awry and I didn’t know what to make of it. I had never felt that way before. I took a lorazepam and went to bed.

As I have learned since becoming seriously ill last October —if there is ever any type of new symptom I need to first look at what I’ve been doing differently or what drug was recently prescribed for me. In this case, the only thing new was the clobetasol proprionate ointment. I did a little Googling and found that it has been well established that low doses of topical clobetasol proprionate can cause adrenal suppression in some people. The adrenals are responsible for our ability to deal with stress! I immediately made the mental connection, though I was completely caught off-guard —it had never occurred to me that a topical ointment could produce this kind of reaction in me —but then again, over the past seven months my body had been reacting to everything!

One particular article I found came from the Journal of the Royal Society of Medicine entitled “Adrenal Suppression Following Low-dose Topical Clobetasol Proprionate” which said specifically:

“The use of topical steroids is associated with adverse systemic effects such as suppression of the hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal (HPA) axis, and application of more than 50 g per week of clobetasol propionate cream has been shown to cause secondary adrenal failure” (Volume 80, July 1987).

The article described “4 patients who used clobetasol propionate cream over a prolonged period; 3 patients used less than 50 g per week (7.5, 25 and 30 g per week) and yet all developed secondary adrenal failure for up to 4 months after cessation of therapy” (Boldface added).

The conclusion was that “relatively small doses of clobetasol propionate cream may cause adverse systemic effects, with suppression of the HPA axis occurring more commonly than has previously been recognized.”

So what is the HPA axis and what happens when it is suppressed?

 According to Oregon State University’s Student Health Services:

 “The HPA axis can be thought of as the body's ‘stress sytem’. It controls the levels of cortisol (the ‘stress hormone’) and other important stress-related hormones. The HPA axis can also be thought of as the body's energy regulator, because it is also responsible for controlling virtually all of the hormones, nervous system activity and energy expenditure in the human body, as well as modulating the immune system. When the HPA axis becomes suppressed, your body will not be able to properly regulate your stress and energy levels, which can manifest in fatigue, suppressed immune system, depression, and anxiety. If you are experiencing such symptoms, you should see your health care provider for recommendations on the appropriate course of action.”

My first thoughts were: Could this really be the case? Just applying a small amount as prescribed? But I already knew my answer. My second thoughts were:  That's all I need to know.  My adrenals were already fatigued by my own diagnosis.  Stop taking it. Immediately.

The very next day, I woke up dizzy again. So much so, that as I sat up and leaned back to get a Kleenex off my nightstand, the room began spinning violently. I waited for it to subside and slowly stood up to use the bathroom but found myself leaning and kept tripping. As I went to get breakfast, I continued to feel very light-headed and off balance. I knew it was vertigo, and made an appointment to see my internist. He was out of town and so I was seen by a Nurse Practitioner, who subsequently diagnosed me with benign paroxysmal positional vertigo (BPPV) and recommended canalith repositioning exercises with a physical therapist (at this point, dollar signs began spinning around the room with everything else. I decided to wait until my internist got back into town and ask his advice.)

In the meantime, the NP prescribed meclizine (for the nausea that accompanied the dizziness) and a nasal spray: fluticasone proprionate. Great… more drugs…. I took the nasal spray and the meclizine the first day, but nothing more after that.

ODD THINGS DURING THE WEEK:

• Experienced some minor tightness/twinges of pain in upper left side of chest off and on early in the week.
• Experienced some mild left-subclavian pain again off and on
• Vertigo throughout the latter half of the week
• More pronounced internal trembling particularly in chest area

My exercise routines were disrupted this week with the vertigo. When I did use the treadmill my carotid pulse was much higher than normal-- for which there seemed to be no cause. For example, at 10 minutes into the walk my pulse is usually around 138. This week it was closer to 174—and hence the decision to not push anything.

When thinking back and wondering why I felt like I had been slipping backwards that week, I thought about my first heart events (for lack of a better work) last October. It seemed like they really slammed me down hard. A lot of things were going wrong before I was finally able to climb back up. And that is how I felt at this point. The strong cardiac flip-flop last Sunday followed by weird new symptoms: vertigo/dizziness and more weight loss without trying and without exercising most of the week. It was all so weird. Whether anything was connected to the other I had no way of knowing—especially after feeling so much better for a couple of months. It truly did feel like two steps backward.